Goal: Making Correct Decisions

A lot has happened poker-wise in the past two weeks for me. I've made over 14k in tournament profit. 3 first place finishes, a third place finish and an eighth place finish in the daily guaranteed tournaments. I was pretty happy, I was on fire really. I was making some of the best moves I've ever made. I kept adjusting to the table conditions and stayed focused. That makes all the difference in the world.

Anyways, this past week my game has gone downhill. I started playing 1 vs 1 cash games for 400 dollar buyins. The first guy was on my level and challenged me way beyond what I'm used to. After a couple different games I went on a horrible cooler. Every hand seemed to somehow be dominated or cracked at some point. And then I found this player.. she was a maniac in every way and I knew she had no chance, her plays were horribly stupid and I made a couple heroic calls while playing her. But, it started happening again, bad beat after bad beat. I mean, thats part of poker right? This just went on for the whole time I played her. Its the most frustrating thing when you know you can beat someone and yet everytime you get your money in with the best of it, a miracle two outer hits. No, I'm not complaining because skill in the long-run wins.

I've noticed my entire game is coming undone. I've been acting on impulse rather than knowledge. I went on major tilt after that headsup match. Somehow I've managed to keep my bankroll under control but my game is not where it was. I've taken a break for about 4 days now, been reading a lot more and posting on the forums. Tonight I have to play though, I'm in the 250k guaranteed tournament, the only one of the month. I just hope I can discipline myself to make correct decisions. I'm not caring about the outcome right now, I just want to have the patience to play the correct way. Sometimes it just really destroys your confidence when you find yourself making the right plays and the other player is still being rewarded. Variance is an evil thing.

I feel like in the next month I'm going to be put to the test a lot. My love for the game has already been challenged. I'm going to have to work hard, study more and somehow acquire more stamina. I need to eat healthier too. Poker is such a complex game. Its a constant mental battle. My own toughest opponent is always going to be myself. I just read a good quote "the expert player is not someone who wins every time they sit down at the table, simply they are the ones who win more in the long run than they lose" I need to keep that in mind.